Scott Wegener is a multi award-winning creative writer who believes in looking on the lighter side of life’s predicaments but still values how serious life is. This site features a wide variety of Scott's published and performed works. If you want to use any of these pieces, or commission something origional, contact Scott Wegener

Sep 23, 2017

Special Talents [Children's Story]

Brief: a Children's story to complement a sermon topic "fulfilling your undiscovered potential"
Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - Sep 24, 2017

Everyone sit across stage, facing audience.
You look like a very clever collection of children.
Do any of you have any tricks you can do with your body? Something maybe most other kids-or adults can't do that you can show us?

Stand up if you can :
  • Go cross eyed
  • Curl your tongue 
  • Whistle
  • Pat your head and rub tummy
  • Wiggle your ears
  • Poke out your tongue touch nose
I'm Pretty good at that one, and I have actually figured out some stretches you can do to be able to do it if you can't normally, so stand up if you want to learn
  • First: Stretch your jaw out as far forward as you can for a few seconds
  • Second, open oyur mouth as wide as you can for a few seconds
  • Third, point your tongue as low as your can for a few seconds
  • fourth, pont you tongue as far our forwards as you can
Now, rest for a moment as your face muscles will be loosened but sore for a bit, I'll show you the last two stretches in a moment .

Isn't it interesting how different people were good at doing different things. 
Hands up, who's good at:
  • Playing the piano?
  • Remembering things, like memory verses?
  • Holding a pet snake? (What about the audience, who's able to hold a snake?)
  • Doing Maths?
  • Drawing? (What about the audience?)
  • Doing Hard Jigsaw puzzles - like 1000 piece jigsaws
  • Reading
  • Writing stories
  • Doing Cartwheels (What about the audience?)
  • Climbing trees
  • Being friends with new kids you've never met?
  • Keeping room always tidy?
  • Finally, who's good at putting your hand up?
As you get older you will start to discover what special gifts you have. Some might be silly talents, like being able to balance books on your head - while riding a unicycle.
Others will be special talents you can use to make he world a better place, like teaching or writing books or making beautiful art.
I hope all of you, as you get older, will discover your talents a quickly as possible and then use them to serve God in any way you can.

NOW, your jaw and you tongue should be rested a bit now. Here's the final two stretches.
  • Stretch your tongue up as far as possible
  • Stretch out your hand and put it on your nose- there you go - your are all now poking out your tongue and touching you're nose at the same time.
 Give them a clap!
 

Sep 2, 2017

Parenting Made Eeasy: How to tell a Dad joke

Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - Sep 2, 2017
Brief: A Father's day skit drama


Joker 1:
Joker 2:
Presenter:
Dad 1:
Dad 2:
Oliver:
Girl:

[jokers stand on one side, presenter in the middle, dads on other side]

P: Welcome to chapter 18 of parenting made easy. We hope you enjoyed our previous chapter exploring the usefulness of various toolbox items when you need an emergency hair tie for school photos.

[girl with cable tie plats walks onto stage like a model, spins, poses her hair, and leaves]

P: In this chapter we're looking at one of the most critical aspects of fatherhood every man needs to master: how to tell a dad joke.
Most traditional jokes require some kind of funniness.

J1: A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry to bother you, sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train."
The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."

P: However, the first rule for any dad joke is the joke must never... be funny.

O: I'm hungry
D1: pleased to meet you, hungry!

[Oliver trips down stairs leaving]

P: Dad jokes should be short and straight to the uncalled for punch line:

D1: Enjoy your trip? 

Jul 29, 2017

Church Family Feud : Largest Books of the Bible [Children's Story]

Brief: a Children's story to complement a sermon topic "fulfilling your undiscovered potential"
Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - Sep 24, 2017

We need the kids up the front please because it's time for... (Family Feud theme song starts) Church Family Feud. (slide goes on screen)

I also need the Pastoral team up the front too please

Quickly choose a captain

We surveyed 1 Bible and the top 8 answers are on the board.
Name a book of the bible with the most chapters:

Jul 22, 2017

First Birthdays

Performance: Sydney Adventist School Auburn
100 Year Anniversary Celebration - July 22, 2017
Brief: A puppet play to fit in with the theme "we are made by God"


•    JOE: sensible, inquisitive
•    WALLACE: frivolous, know it all.
•    GRANDPA: kind, intelligent. (egg carton prop)

[Joe enters, whistling, glances at audience but keeps going, then freezes. Looks back at audience. Pans looking from side to side in amazement and calls out.]
JOE: Umm, Grandpa!
[Pa enters, looking at girl.]
Pa: Yes, Joe.
JOE: [whispers] There's a whole bunch of people here.
PA: [looks around] Oh, so there are.
JOE: Whyyyy?... It's a Saturday.
PA: Well, they're probably here for the birthday party.
JOE: [excited] Birthday!
PA: Yes, 100 years old.
JOE: [amazed] 100 years, wow.... none of them look that old. Except maybe that guy over there with the beard.
PA: No, it's not their birthday.
JOE: [jumps in quickly] Is it your birthday, grandpa? Wow didn't know your were 100!
PA: No, I'm not 100.
JOE: You're not? Well how much older are you? You don't look a day over 110!

Jun 25, 2017

Adventure With Jesus Series [x6]

Week of Prayer: Adventure With Jesus
Performance: Hill Adventist School - June 26-30, 2017

Set in heaven each day, performed looking into audience as if they are earth.
Cast members :
  1. God: calm but loving in nature
  2. Gabe: excitable, worked up into a panic mostly
  3. Jesus: calm and loving also. Day 1, 5, 6.
  4. Mary and Joseph mimers: Day 1
  5. Angels :Day 2,4,5
  6. Satan: Day 5


1. Monday - Birth of a King

G: Jesus

J: Yes father

G: It’s time... for you to go to earth.

J: I know. I was hoping this day would never come, but I always knew it would.

G: Yes. At least it won’t be for too long.

J: Yes, I know, but after spending eternity with you, It’s going to be hard to be away from you for the first time.

G: It’s the only way we can save them.

J: Yes I know, I’m happy to go. I’ll do anything to have the humans able to come home to us,

G: Yes! I love them so much too. We have to free them from the world turned evil by Satan.
J: So much pain and death there. It hurts so much.

G: Yes… and you're about to…..

J: I know… I’m about to experience it... just as the Humans do.

May 13, 2017

Parenting Made Easy: How to behave like a mother

Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - May 13, 2017
Brief: A mother's day skit drama



[Presenter] Welcome to chapter 14 of Parenting made easy: How to behave like a Mother.
We hope you enjoyed the previous chapter on how to give birth to twins while stuck in Pennant Hillls Rd traffic... and still make it to work on time.
In this chapter we’re discussing ideal behaviour to exhibit once you become a mother.
(sweetly) After the honeymoon nine-months come to an end, where your child was conceived...

ALL MUMS: Oh La La! (cheeky)

[Presenter] ...and you had 8 and four quarter months of glowing skin...

ALL MUMS: Blaaahhhhh! (spew)

[Presenter] ...and your child was brought effortlessly into the world...

ALL MUMS: AAAAAAAAUUUUGGGHHHHHH!!!!!! (scream)

Apr 15, 2017

The Operator

Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - April 15, 2017

Brief: Jesus love is for eternity

Guy sitting on right side of stage - only heard out of right speaker, girl on left side heard in left speaker. An Operator is out of sight and is voice-over only

Boy: Hello, operator?

Operator: Hello Stephen, how may I help you tonight, would you like to be connected through to one, nine, seven, eight again?

Boy: Yes please!

Operator:  Certainly, one moment, please hold

[phone rings for girl]
 
Girl: Hello?

Operator:  I have a young man wanting to talk with you again, shall I connect you?"

Girl: Oh, yes please!

Operator:  Connecting now, enjoy

 [ begins mushy love-struck conversation ] 

Girl: Hello Steve

Boy: Hi Bec, what cha doin?

Girl: Nothing,... thinking about you. 

Boy: Me to.... I love you, snookums.

Girl: I love you too, schmoopsy.

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