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Oct 1, 2012

The Slime List

 No Darwinian, Scott Wegener contemplates
what it would be like to, to put it bluntly, "evolve."

There are some moments in my life I wish I could evolve.
Like when you’re carrying a heavy cardboard box and you come to a door that is closed. A literal third arm would come in very  . . . handy (too early for a pun? Sorry).

While there’s many reasons I don’t believe evolution played a role in how I became the specimen I am today, if I DID believe I was a part of a Slow-Level Improve-Myself Evolution  program (or SLIME for short), I would definitely have my own list of things to develop.
It would be a little like a ‘bucket list’, which is a list of things you want to do before you ‘kick the bucket’. A SLIME list is a register of bodily changes my family line is currently working on evolving.
It would be necessary to have such a list so our family line knows whether their evolving sessions should concentrate on developing a reversing eye in the back of the head or a volume dial to adjust hearing levels.

As for my family line’s SLIME list, it includes the following:


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