Scott Wegener is a multi award-winning creative writer who believes in looking on the lighter side of life’s predicaments but still values how serious life is. This site features a wide variety of Scott's published and performed works. If you want to use any of these pieces, or commission something origional, contact Scott Wegener

Dec 22, 2018

Star Guidance ​

Brief: A Christmas skit on the sermon topic of 'The Guiding Star'

Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - December 22, 2018

[Four wise men walk down isle and stop on stage.]

1: We must stop, these heavily clouded skies are making it impossible to see the guiding star.

4: Not again. This is getting ridiculous. We just spent a week at the last town waiting for the clouds to clear and now, only three score furlongs along, we have to stop again and twiddle our royal thumbs.

2: Patience, young king, the guiding star is the only way we’ll find salvation.

4: There must be another way to help speed this up. I got Carol’s program to get back for.

3: Carols program?

4: Yes, princess Carol is holding a sing-a-long in our kingdom, I promised I’d host the event, so we can’t just wait around here doing nothing.

1: The scriptures suggest it is a star we must follow, and without clear skies we can not follow this guiding star.

4: Well, this obviously isn’t a very efficient way of navigating. Let me show you a gadget I’ve been working on. Its called a GPS.
2: GPS?

4: Yes, Guidance Per Stars. It basically receives a time stamp signal from satellites put up in the stars and by calculating the length of time each signal takes to be transmitted it can triangulate and tell you where you are in the world and lead you to where you want to go.

3: Well that sounds pretty clever. So which way do we need to go?

4: Well, you just type in your destination... “mess-I-ah”... and press go. Once it locks onto some satellites we’ll be off.\

1: How long does it take to ‘lock on’ to a satellite?

4: Aahh, yeah... there is one small setback currently. Satellites haven’t been invented yet.

2: Now who’s wasting our time.

4: Ok, wait... follow a star, you say?

3: It is true

4: Well, I happen to have a Woman’s day scroll-zeen with me...

[123 stare with eyebrows raised]

4: What? I thought the Messiah's mother might like something to read. Did YOU three think to bring any gifts?

1: I brought myrrh

2: I brought frankincense

3: I brought cash

4: Right. Well anyway, it has some directions from the stars. Maybe we can follow them?
Let’s see - star signs... here we go: “You may or may not find love. Now could be a good time to invest. Follow your heart to a new direction.”
A new direction! There you go!

1: Well, that way would be a new direction... [points to back of the church]

4: You’re right! Let’s go!

2: Yes........ let’s.

[ no one follows, waits while 4 leaves back doors to head up to balcony ]

3: [joke gone wrong] He’s not coming back is he?

1: Ahh, the star, let’s haste!

2: Should we get the lad?

3: Nah, he’ll follow the guiding Star and find salvation, surely!

[begin to walk out back stage door and 4 starts taking up on balcony .]

4: Greetings, O little town of Balcony. Has anyone seen the Messiah?... No? What about a baby?... Anyone?... Have you seen a baby sir? Have you heard a baby? Smelt one?... Surely someone has seen the Messiah.

[continue until 123 enter font balcony and bow]

4: HEY! Guys!... GUYS!...Over here. Any luck? He doesn’t appear to be up here.

1: Yes, He is here!

4: REALLY!! I’ll be right over... don’t go anywhere!

[races down stairs “I’m coming messiah” “no I already have a bulletin, thanks” and 123 left too. They meet on stage again]

4: You found him! That’s so exciting!! Give me directions the Star is gone, where do I need to go?

2: Well... they had to flee from Herod - he is no longer there.

4: Naw! Now I can’t give them my scroll-zeen. I should have had patience and followed the guiding star.

3: Let’s go set up camp, we’ve got a long journey to start tomorrow.

1: Say, speaking of Stars - you wouldn’t happen to have some paper to STARt a camp fire would you?

4: Fine [hands over scroll-zeen]


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