Scott Wegener is a multi award-winning creative writer who believes in looking on the lighter side of life’s predicaments but still values how serious life is. This site features a wide variety of Scott's published and performed works. If you want to use any of these pieces, or commission something origional, contact Scott Wegener

Nov 25, 2017


Brief: a skit to complement a sermon on Legacy to church and community
Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - Nov 25, 2017

[Sombre background funeral organ music plays. Sam comes in and sits on one end of a row of chairs. An extra comes in and sits opposite end, then Joe comes in and sits in the middle. All have a funeral program and look through (has script in it :). Sam however has a pen out, thinks for a bit and then writes occasionally, but crosses out soon after.]

J: Huh! So his middle name was Bartimaeus

S: Yeah, he kept that secret well.

J: I see you're doing the eulogy.

S: Yeah.

J: So you were good friends with Matt?

S: Yes, long-time friends.

J: Aahhh, so much to talk about, hey. It's always hard to know what to leave out?

S: Well, I'm having trouble thinking of anything meaningful actually.

J: Oh, what have you got so far?

S: Well, not much really.... He was nice.
J: I see. Well, did he volunteer at all anywhere?

S: No, don't think so.

J: Did he do anything at church?

S: Not really.

J: No church jobs?

S: Oh, I think he was on the selection committee once.

J: Right, well there must be something interesting about him, what was his day job?

S: Accountant.

J: Oh, I see. Say no more.

S: I think he was involved in Meals on Wheels.

J: There you go, talk about that!

S: Oh, no actually, that was his brother, David

J: Oh yeah, Dave, now he's a good bloke. Always getting in and helping.

S: Yeah, always thinking of others.

J: Yep. Old Dave-o...

S: Yeah. Good bloke.

J: Yep......[ pause]  s’pose you can't talk about Dave?

S: Mmm, guess not.

J: Pity. Good bloke, Dave.

S: Yeah.

J: Hey did Matt ever write anything?  (S: No.)

J: Help a charity?  (S: No.)

J: Give Bible studies?  (S: No.)

J: Sponsor a child?  (S: No.)

J: Plant a tree? (S: No.)

J: Share a Facebook post about saving pandas?  (S: No.)

J: Nothing at all?

S: .... nooo.

J: Hey, looks like you're up!

[Sam gets up to speak]

S: It's an honour and privilege to be chosen to share the achievements of Matt.
I knew Matt very well since high school.
And it hurts to be standing here saying goodbye this morning.
So how does one sum up the legacy of Matt’s life in the short time we’ve got here this morning?
Well....Matt... was.... nice??....
Refreshments will now be served in the hall special thanks to Joan who volunteered her time to prepare the food instead of helping out at the op shop today.
And when you’re down there make sure you give Dave a donation or two for his mission trip to Cambodia next month. Thank you.

[Organ plays bouncy cheerful music - Matt is forgotten about already.]


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