Who's Leaving, What's Staying... [skit to anounce a departing leader from a club]

Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - November  23, 2019

Abbott: Well, it's that time of year where some new leaders will be joining our club, some leaders are staying, and sadly other leaders are leaving.

Costello: Hey, have you got a list of what each leader is doing?

Abbott: I certainly do.

Costello: Well, let's hear it, I really want to know which leaders are leaving so we can give them a gift.

Abbott: OK, I’ll tell you their names, but you need to know some of our leaders have some strange pet names, so let’s see:
[read slowly] Who’s leaving, What’s staying, and I Don’t Know is joining.

Costello: That’s what I want to find out.

Abbott: I just said, Who’s leaving, What’s staying, and I Don’t Know is joining.

Costello: Have you got the list of next year’s leaders?

Abbott: Why yes

Costello: And does it show whether the current leaders are staying or leaving?

Abbott: Why certainly

Costello: Then looking at your list, tell me who’s leaving

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: I mean the person’s name.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The person leaving.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The leader’s name.

Abbott: Who!

Costello: The person leaving.

Abbott: Who is leaving.

Costello: I’m asking YOU who’s leaving!

Abbott: That’s the leader’s name.

Costello: That’s who's name?

Abbott: Yeah.

Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.

Abbott: That’s it.

Costello: That’s who?

Abbott: Yeah.


Costello: Look, you got a leader leaving the club?

Abbott: Certainly.

Costello: Who’s leaving?

Abbott: That’s right.


Costello: When the departing leader was sent text messages through the year asking them to get ready for a club meeting, who gets the SMS?

Abbott: Every time.

Costello: All I’m trying to find out is the leader's name that’s leaving.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The leader that gets the SMS.

Abbott: That’s it.

Costello: Who gets the Sms?

Abbott: They do! Sometimes their partner replies.

Costello: Whose partner?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: Look, all I want to know is when you get an SMS reply from the departing leader, how did they sign the Sms?

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The leader.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: How do they sign their name?

Abbott: That is how they sign it!

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Yes.


Costello: All I’m trying to find out is what’s the leader’s name that’s leaving.

Abbott: No, what’s staying.

Costello: I’m not asking who’s staying.

Abbott: Who is leaving!

Costello: Yes, What’s the name of the leaving leader ?!

Abbott: No, What's the name of the staying leader!

Costello: I’m not asking you who’s staying!

Abbott: Who’s leaving.

Costello: I don’t know.

Abbott: Oh, they're joining us.


Costello: Now how did I get onto incoming leaders?

Abbott: Well you mentioned their name.

Costello: If I mentioned their name, who did I say’s joining?

Abbott: No, Who’s leaving.

Costello: LOOK! We've got a big list of leaders: some coming, some going, some staying.

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: Now, we have a gift to give away to the leaders leaving us, and were going to now give that gift to who?

Abbott: Now that’s the first thing that you’ve said right.

Costello: I don’t even know what I’m talking about!


Look let me get two leaders up here [get leaving leaders up]

Now, will these guys be leaving our club, after 5 years as leaders?

Abbott: Yes

Costello: Well why didn’t you say they were leaving?

Abbott: You never asked!


All items on this site are written by Scott Wegener, a multi award-winning Australian creative writer, specialising in fun Christian dramas and articles. He believes in looking on the lighter side of life while still valuing the eternal seriousness of life's decisions. This site is essentially a place Scott stores his works, sometimes without much copy-editing (do forgive any spelling/grammar creativity you spot on this site that comes free of charge due to his slight dyslexia).