Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - November 23, 2019
Abbott: Well, it's that time of year where some new leaders will be joining our club, some leaders are staying, and sadly other leaders are leaving.
Costello: Hey, have you got a list of what each leader is doing?
Abbott: I certainly do.
Costello: Well, let's hear it, I really want to know which leaders are leaving so we can give them a gift.
Abbott: OK, I’ll tell you their names, but you need to know some of our leaders have some strange pet names, so let’s see:
[read slowly] Who’s leaving, What’s staying, and I Don’t Know is joining.
Costello: That’s what I want to find out.
Abbott: I just said, Who’s leaving, What’s staying, and I Don’t Know is joining.
Costello: Have you got the list of next year’s leaders?
Abbott: Why yes
Costello: And does it show whether the current leaders are staying or leaving?
Abbott: Why certainly
Costello: Then looking at your list, tell me who’s leaving
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: I mean the person’s name.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The person leaving.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The leader’s name.
Abbott: Who!
Costello: The person leaving.
Abbott: Who is leaving.
Costello: I’m asking YOU who’s leaving!
Abbott: That’s the leader’s name.
Costello: That’s who's name?
Abbott: Yeah.
Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.
Abbott: That’s it.
Costello: That’s who?
Abbott: Yeah.
(Pause)
Costello: Look, you got a leader leaving the club?
Abbott: Certainly.
Costello: Who’s leaving?
Abbott: That’s right.
(Pause)
Costello: When the departing leader was sent text messages through the year asking them to get ready for a club meeting, who gets the SMS?
Abbott: Every time.
Costello: All I’m trying to find out is the leader's name that’s leaving.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The leader that gets the SMS.
Abbott: That’s it.
Costello: Who gets the Sms?
Abbott: They do! Sometimes their partner replies.
Costello: Whose partner?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: Look, all I want to know is when you get an SMS reply from the departing leader, how did they sign the Sms?
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The leader.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: How do they sign their name?
Abbott: That is how they sign it!
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Yes.
(Pause)
Costello: All I’m trying to find out is what’s the leader’s name that’s leaving.
Abbott: No, what’s staying.
Costello: I’m not asking who’s staying.
Abbott: Who is leaving!
Costello: Yes, What’s the name of the leaving leader ?!
Abbott: No, What's the name of the staying leader!
Costello: I’m not asking you who’s staying!
Abbott: Who’s leaving.
Costello: I don’t know.
Abbott: Oh, they're joining us.
(Pause)
Costello: Now how did I get onto incoming leaders?
Abbott: Well you mentioned their name.
Costello: If I mentioned their name, who did I say’s joining?
Abbott: No, Who’s leaving.
Costello: LOOK! We've got a big list of leaders: some coming, some going, some staying.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: Now, we have a gift to give away to the leaders leaving us, and were going to now give that gift to who?
Abbott: Now that’s the first thing that you’ve said right.
Costello: I don’t even know what I’m talking about!
(Pause)
Look let me get two leaders up here [get leaving leaders up]
Now, will these guys be leaving our club, after 5 years as leaders?
Abbott: Yes
Costello: Well why didn’t you say they were leaving?
Abbott: You never asked!
Christian dramas (and more) by Scott Wegener