Who's Leaving, What's Staying... [skit to anounce a departing leader from a club]

Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - November  23, 2019

Abbott: Well, it's that time of year where some new leaders will be joining our club, some leaders are staying, and sadly other leaders are leaving.

Costello: Hey, have you got a list of what each leader is doing?

Abbott: I certainly do.

Costello: Well, let's hear it, I really want to know which leaders are leaving so we can give them a gift.

Abbott: OK, I’ll tell you their names, but you need to know some of our leaders have some strange pet names, so let’s see:
[read slowly] Who’s leaving, What’s staying, and I Don’t Know is joining.

Costello: That’s what I want to find out.

Abbott: I just said, Who’s leaving, What’s staying, and I Don’t Know is joining.

Costello: Have you got the list of next year’s leaders?

Abbott: Why yes

Costello: And does it show whether the current leaders are staying or leaving?

Abbott: Why certainly

Costello: Then looking at your list, tell me who’s leaving

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: I mean the person’s name.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The person leaving.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The leader’s name.

Abbott: Who!

Costello: The person leaving.

Abbott: Who is leaving.

Costello: I’m asking YOU who’s leaving!

Abbott: That’s the leader’s name.

Costello: That’s who's name?

Abbott: Yeah.

Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.

Abbott: That’s it.

Costello: That’s who?

Abbott: Yeah.

(Pause)

Costello: Look, you got a leader leaving the club?

Abbott: Certainly.

Costello: Who’s leaving?

Abbott: That’s right.

(Pause)

Costello: When the departing leader was sent text messages through the year asking them to get ready for a club meeting, who gets the SMS?

Abbott: Every time.

Costello: All I’m trying to find out is the leader's name that’s leaving.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The leader that gets the SMS.

Abbott: That’s it.

Costello: Who gets the Sms?

Abbott: They do! Sometimes their partner replies.

Costello: Whose partner?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: Look, all I want to know is when you get an SMS reply from the departing leader, how did they sign the Sms?

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The leader.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: How do they sign their name?

Abbott: That is how they sign it!

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Yes.

(Pause)

Costello: All I’m trying to find out is what’s the leader’s name that’s leaving.

Abbott: No, what’s staying.

Costello: I’m not asking who’s staying.

Abbott: Who is leaving!

Costello: Yes, What’s the name of the leaving leader ?!

Abbott: No, What's the name of the staying leader!

Costello: I’m not asking you who’s staying!

Abbott: Who’s leaving.

Costello: I don’t know.

Abbott: Oh, they're joining us.

(Pause)

Costello: Now how did I get onto incoming leaders?

Abbott: Well you mentioned their name.

Costello: If I mentioned their name, who did I say’s joining?

Abbott: No, Who’s leaving.

Costello: LOOK! We've got a big list of leaders: some coming, some going, some staying.

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: Now, we have a gift to give away to the leaders leaving us, and were going to now give that gift to who?

Abbott: Now that’s the first thing that you’ve said right.

Costello: I don’t even know what I’m talking about!

(Pause)

Look let me get two leaders up here [get leaving leaders up]

Now, will these guys be leaving our club, after 5 years as leaders?

Abbott: Yes

Costello: Well why didn’t you say they were leaving?

Abbott: You never asked!