Background Noise [script]

A play for three, introducing the topic of God seemingly being pictured as a 'bad guy' in the old testament.


[Mum Dad and Daughter sit around table with papers.]

Dad: So, lets quickly review the minutes of the last meeting:
•    It was agreed that I put a scheduled reminder in my phone so I put the correct rubbish bins out each week.
•    We need to stop playing our tubas after 10pm, as per the neighbour’s request.
•    And we never quite figured out who’s leaving the toilet seat up.

Rebecca: Dad, you’re the only guy in the house!

Dad: No, Toby is a guy to.

Rebecca: Since when do guinea pigs use a toilet?

Dad: So, moving on to tonight’s main agenda item, and that’s discussing whether or not Rebecca’s love interest is a suitable match for eternal marriage.

Rebecca: Dad!?!!!

Dad: No, your mother and I want what’s best for you, so we both did some background checks on Joshua and also his parents. Mum, what did you discover?

Mum: Well, I researched the socials of Joshua, and he does seem a remarkable young man.
He uses clean language online, does some volunteering, keeps his clothes on in photos, doesn’t seem to take selfies, and seems to be in training to be a pastor. Honestly, he seems like the perfect guy. So he has the ok from me. 

Dad: Ok, well I did some background checks on his parents and, well… there’s some things I think we need to consider.
It seems his mother was pregnant before she married, so that’s not great, though she seems like a nice lady otherwise. However I find record of two fathers, one father, seems to be some kind of step-dad that died fairly young, however Joshua’s other father, is quite some piece of work.
Apparently he’s a King, of sorts, a bit of a magician even, and though he has some charitable tendencies, he claims to being an Alpha male and has countless deaths he’s been involved with, all the while seaming to demand people worship him.   

Mum: He sound’s awful!

Rebecca: Dad!?!! 

Dad: They say the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, so, I’m sorry, Rebecca, I really don’t think it best to have a long-term relationship with Joshua.

Rebecca: But dad! You haven’t even met his father. He’ the most loving guy you’ll ever meet. In fact….. um

Dad: ….What?

Rebecca: Nothing.

Dad: So there IS something to hide!

Rebecca: No!

Dad: Then what is it were you going to say.

Rebecca: Well, Joshua and His father seem to… love me even more than you do.

Mum: WHAT? Honey, that’s impossible! You have no idea of the sacrifices we’ve made out of love for you!

Rebecca: Yes, I know. But so have they.

Dad: But the deaths! The countless deaths!

Rebecca: But there’s answers!

Dad: We’ll see. I think we need to adjourn this meeting, do some more research on this father before you even go near his son. This all just sounds too risky, having a mobster as a father.
All in favour or adjourning this meeting to do more research? [ mum and dad raise hands]
Any opposed? [Rebecca raises hand, “Dad!”]
It’s passed. No falling in love with this guy until we find out what his father is REALLY like.
Meeting adjourned.


Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church Camp @ Crosslands - October 29, 2022


All items on this site are written by Scott Wegener, a multi award-winning Australian creative writer, specialising in fun Christian dramas and articles. He believes in looking on the lighter side of life while still valuing the eternal seriousness of life's decisions. This site is essentially a place Scott stores his works, sometimes without much copy-editing (do forgive any spelling/grammar creativity you spot on this site that comes free of charge due to his slight dyslexia).