Uninformed Norm [Record Offering commercial]

I had the privilege of a spot of acting for a 3 part promotional fundraising (offering) video for Record magazine - which I was once an editorial assistant for.

Meet Uninformed Norm:

Part Two, the following year:

Part 3, the following year

Record ad: May 4 2024

The Why Thousand Years [Article/chapter on the Seventh-day Adventist fundamental belief 28 about the Millennium]

Published: RECORD - February 3, 2018
Living 28 - February 2020

Stopovers when traveling by air are generally good to avoid. That way you’re lessening the risk of disconnected flights, not to mention the opportunity for luggage to go missing.
However, there’s one stopover that will be a rewarding experience, even though it involves a 1000-year wait to go home—without your baggage too.
I’m talking about a stopover to end all stopovers—the millennium in heaven spoken about in the Bible.
It’s a common belief that people will be going to heaven for eternity. However, a little Bible study reveals we’re only there for a mere 1000-year stopover—and I say “only” because that’s not much longer than our great-great-(etc)-grandfather, Methuselah, lived for. After that we arrive back home on earth again. This means the rousing last verse of Amazing Grace really needs to be sung “When we’ve been there 1000 years . . .” to be biblically correct.
But don’t get upset at being returned to earth. I agree the proposition of leaving heaven to end up back on earth initially sounds like you’ve being downgraded from first-class luxury to miserable-class torture. But fear not, the earth is being reinstalled to its original sin-free goodness soon after our return.

A Mother with Whiskers

 RECORD, September 2016 
 Health & Home, May-June 2018

It needs to be said: a father is not just a mother with whiskers. In addition to all the parallel responsibilities there is actually a lot more pressure on being a father than being a mother.
Granted we miss child-birthing experiences, from obstetrician visits, to morning sickness, epidural needles, stretch marks, caesareans, 20-hour labours, nine-pound (4 kg) babies . . .

Happy birthday, God!

 RECORD, October 21, 2006

I like having birthdays. You probably do too. Birthdays usually mean a party (I like going to parties). A party usually means presents (I like getting presents), party food (I like party food), birthday cake (I like cake) and games and activities (I like them too!).

But I didn’t do anything . . .

"I decided to keep silent and see what happened next." 

 RECORD, March 4, 2006

I feel a little guilty. I’m not sure if I should; you be the judge.

My cubbyhouse in heaven

"Like cubbyhouses as a kid? Imagine what kind of cubbies could be in heaven!"

 RECORD, October 22, 2005

Cubbyhouses are fun. Not only playing in them but building them too. Do you have, or have you ever
had, a cubbyhouse? I’ve always wanted a treehouse but only ever had one on the ground.

The Big Brother Disgrace

"But . . . having all this knowledge, we still slip up in full view of our Judge." 

  RECORD, August 6, 2005

Lucky RECORD: Match ’n’ win!

Your Individual Special Selection Numbers to check:
0237, 2981, 4103, 5633, 8772

RECORD, April 23, 2005

Record RECORD Offering

I wrote most of this as a place holder for an appeal article for people to give generously to an offering to help fun the magazine, called RECORD. Most of it was left in! 

Next week is a RECORD Offering. No, we don’t mean record as in those black round things we heard some elderly lady talk about that played music. She said that they needed needles to play—sounds dangerous to us. No wonder they have been phased out. We don’t mean record as in “A record has been achieved—the biggest offering ever given.” But that would be impressive, especially if a record offering were received for RECORD. That would make it a record RECORD Offering. We’d have to publish a clever headline to record the record RECORD Offering in the RECORD. (Now we’re sounding like a broken record, broken record, broken record . . .)

RECORD News Articles

From 2005-2007 Scott Wegener contributed weekly to the Seventh-day Adventist church's South Pacific Division's weekly RECORD news magazine. Mainly working on the "Flashpoint" section, made up of snappy news stories a mere couple of paragraphs long, Scott collated and edited Christian related news stories that were usually either inspiring or through provoking (or perhaps downright ridiculous).
There's perhaps little point to republishing the hundreds of articles he completed again on site, but instead, here's perhaps his all time favorites he pieced together.

See how many puns and product references you can find in this fun article about Sanitarium that appeared in the February 12, 2005 issue of RECORD:

What do you get if you combine a dragon boat, water plus a team of Sanitarium workers? Weet-Bix Warriors, a team recipe so good it has now produced its third consecutive dragon-boat race win. Organised by the West Lake Macquarie Support Group, the fundraising event, on Lake Macquarie,  NSW, raised $A6000 to help keep the Westpac rescue helicopter up and going. Out of the spread of competitors the Wyee Rural Fire Service tried
to mar mighty Weet-Bix Warriors serial wins, but the Sanitarium team’s 20
paddlers, drummer and helmsman’s good start helped them claim a narrow victory.—

 

And another I oped a bit of fun into, June 11, 2005:

If all the Weet-Bix eaten in Australia during 2004 were laid end to end it would be a very expensive exercise and a logistical nightmare. However, if it were actually accomplished, it would stretch almost three times around the equator. Also, if a football field measuring 100 metres x 40 metres were covered with the Weet-Bix made last year from Sanitarium’s Cooranbong factory alone, it would be enough to cover the field to a depth of approximately 4.5 metres. Mix that with the almost 10 Olympic-size swimming pools of So Good produced each year and you’ve got a super serve of seriously soggy cereal!—Scott Wegener 

And here's one made up for April 1, 2006

A recent ministers meeting in Greater Sydney Conference discussed the growing trend of conducting Bible cyber-studies over the internet. While it was unanimously agreed that studying via the internet was both a time and fi nancially economical method of preparing a candidate for baptism, disagreement came over the act of baptism itself conducted via the internet. A subsequent vote came out in favour of cyper-baptisums being recognised as a valid practice of the conference on the condition that the right font was used.—Owen Lee/Joe King

 

Ok, one more from RECORD (Maybe I DID have more fun than I remember...): http://www.scottpublished.com/2005/03/record-record-offering.html

 

Help Handling Hypocrites

"As Christians,we are representing the idea of true forgiveness to the world."

 RECORD, January 29, 2005

Important findings

"After my year (plus some) in the work-force wilderness, I was beginning to wonder if my career was of interest to God at all. "

 RECORD, July 17, 2004

Berto Caption Competition

RECORD, January 31, 1998

Scott's wins Berto Just a coincidence cartoon caption competition