Performance: Castle Hill Seventh-day Adventist Church - Aug 10, 2019
[an angel, either in angel costume or golfing costume and with golf bag over shoulder, enters on the balcony]
Excuse me everybody, have any of you kids up here seen my golf ball?
Can you check under you seats please? Nope? I;m sure it should have landed around here somewhere. How about over here, can you check? No?
[looks over balcony edge]
Oh, maybe it’s down there, with all those animals. Kids, could you come down there with me and help me look for my ball? It's my favorite golf ball.
[starts down the stairs]
I guess if you're flowing me, we should use the stairs, safer that way.
It's so slow traveling this way though.
Hey why is that person handing out little pieces of folded trees at the front door? Don’t you think that’s strange?
[enters main church room]
It should be down here somewhere. Let’s look over here, are there any kids here who want to help me look for my golf ball? Can you look under your seats? No? Come and help me look.
Lets go sit up on the stage and think about this for a moment.
Oh, let me introduce myself. How rude of me. I’m Scott-brielle. You may have heard of my cousin, Gabrielle?
I’m an Angel. I live in heaven,
Did you know us angels play golf around the universe? Yes, we love it!
Have you seen shooting stars? They are golf balls angels are hitting from planet to planet.
Is this earth? Wow I’ve heard so much about this place but have never been here.
All my other angel friends try to avoid earth actually.
This place really is as disgusting as they say!
You have sin here, don’t you!
Wow poor you, and you live here! Got no choice I suppose.
You should see the other worlds out there. Much nicer.
Though apparently it was nice here once.
I can see resemblance of God’s handy work here. In fact, you all look a bit like God - though much shorter, and uglier - sorry. Not as bright either.
I bet you can’t wait for Jesus to come back and fix everything!
You know I think he might be coming soon - there’s been a lot of extra second coming rehearsals lately.
Hey, let me encourage you. Don’t give up. Maybe life is hard for you now. Maybe you do things wrong that you wish you didn’t. But don’t give up. Keep trying even when you fail to be good. God still loves you - and you just HAVE to come to Heaven.
It's SO much nicer there than here. I mean wow!! Just look how wrinkly all the animals here are for starters! What's that? they are your parents? Oh, I'm so sorry.
Hang on, hang on... I think I see it!!
[pulls out imaginary ball form church flowers]
Here we are! Look, you can see why it’s my favorite ball - it’s signed by Jesus!
What? You can’t see it? Oh, of course, it’s an angel ball. It’s not made of atoms like your golf balls!
Well better take my shot. Sit back a bit...
You know I was trying to hit my ball from just outside the Andromeda galaxy and straight through Orion, but I hooked it a bit and ended up in this death trap called Earth.
The others said I should declare it a lost ball and not to bother coming here. But this is my fav ball. Did I show you Jesus' signature? Oh right, can't see it. Shame.
Hey have you ever played golf on heaven’s golf courses? Oh, of course you haven’t!
Very beautiful courses up there, but very tricky as there’s so many unicorns and t-Rex’s on the fairways - ut don't worry , the T-rexes are eating grass, not the unicorns. But it’s very hard to play around them that's what makes the golf the challenge up there!
You don’t have any t-Rex’s round here anymore do you? Lucky. Makes golf much easier.
Ok, here we go. I'm going to hit this a loooong way.
What’s that smell??? This place stinks. You can't smell that. I guess you're used to the stink of earth.
Shhh, re we go.
[gives a miniature whack and then looks quickly up where the shot would have flown into outer space]
Come on, come on. Oh!! Yes!! Right next to the Sombrero galaxy , I should be able to putt it in from there.
Well I better go. Remember, don’t give up - there is an awesome life ahead of you once Jesus returns.
Oh, you know what? I’ll say hi to Jesus for you when I get back.
See you up there!
All items on this site are written by Scott Wegener, a multi award-winning Australian creative writer, specialising in fun Christian dramas and articles. He believes in looking on the lighter side of life while still valuing the eternal seriousness of life's decisions. This site is essentially a place Scott stores his works, sometimes without much copy-editing (do forgive any spelling/grammar creativity you spot on this site that comes free of charge due to his slight dyslexia).